Apathy Sucks

Meh

Quitting my job

So I've decided after fixing just about everything that breaks at Drug Fair, that I'm going to quit and put an add in the paper to be a handy man. I'd probably make a shit ton more money, plus I may get to meet sexy house wives! Sounds like a plan to me!

Sunday is Officially my new least favorite day

So, as I previously mentioned, this weekend was supposed to be awesome. Regardless of how I was feeling, it was the only thing I was looking forward to all week. Well, everything seemed alright at first. My mom was about to leave, Shannon was getting ready. Then time just kept passing and I called her to see what was up.

I'm not mad, at all in fact. I should be, but I'm not. I understand why she backed out. It's fucking weird meeting someone for the first time that you know you already like. I was scared as all hell, and now I still am. I'm not mad, no... but I'm terrified now. I don't really know what's ever going to become of any of this.

The part that bugged me was the fact that she stopped even talking to me. Turned her phone off and I guess went to sleep. I don't even know.

I got a text during all of this, that said "Come to the fair" from Hannah. I told her I was in south Jersey and she responded with "You would be." I'm really not sure why I mentioned that, or even what it means.

I just wish that break was sooner, because I'm really not going to be up for this week after this.

I really don't know what the hell is wrong with me.

Lets start from the start today.

Error number one: I skipped my first two classes. Yeah way to go you fucktard, why don't we try and fail out of school number two. I really don't know how I manage to do the incredibly asinine things I do.

Error number two: Totally bombed my history quiz, knew about it for 2 weeks... and fucking stared at the sky.

Error number three: Worked out to painstakingly amounts of soreness, finishing ten minutes before I had to go to:

Error number four: Fucking Drug Fair.

Error number five: I started over thinking this weekend. For those of you who I haven't told, I'm going to my mom's house Saturday night, and Sunday I am supposed to meet Shannon for the first time. Yeah, but leave it to me to get myself all worked up about it.

Error number six: Get all fucking emo at stupid comments because of the above.

Error number seven: Instead of just going to bed, or watching TV, or doing something that would stop me from having access to this hell hole we call the internet. I'm sitting here droning on and on about how miserable my day was.

Yeah I don't know, my overwhelming lack of self confidence is just beating the shit out of me with a tennis racket at the moment. That whole like, omg what if this? and what if that? shit is just whizzing through my brain, and all I keep saying to myself is no, this is exactly what you want asshole. I just hope like three things happen.

1. I don't like die on the way up there or not get any sleep or some other stupid thing because I'm being an ass.
2. One of us doesn't pussy out.
3. We hate each other in person.

Guess we'll see, /emo off